I Tried Writing While Half-Dead at 1:42AM and Somehow Ended Up Solving Politics

It’s 1:42 AM and I’m sick as a dog. Must find a way to survive. My nose is running like a tap, my eyes are itchy, and my throught is fucked. On top of that, I’m so hazy I can’t even remember how to spell “throat”. I should go back to bed, but I’m too sick for bed. Worst cold ever, not counting the time in that German prison, but Ricky doesn’t speak of such things.

That’s called writing to entertain the reader. I don’t know if I should do more of that instead of the mush I spit out, but the mush is faster and more nutritious, according to 9 out of 10 dentists. There I go again, trying to make the reader enjoy the experience. Are you not entertained, Michael from Bletchley?

The problem with entertaining the reader is that you’re so busy being interesting that you never actually get to the point, or in my case, find one. Oh, I’m so sick. At least now I can have a day off and actually get some work done.

Write for the reader, Ricky. No one wants to read your shit. It’s root marm dressed up as punkin and tady.

Let’s get away from talking about Ricky, the author, and talk about Trump, the fat, smelly conman that half the world loves for some ungodly reason. It speaks to a sickness in the world. The very people who have embraced grace and cast out sin through declaring Jesus as sovereign are declaring the guy, or the turd, a modern-day profit. Notice how I spelled the word prophet. The guy does larger, stinkier turds than Andre the Giant after an all-you-can-eat buffet, may he rest in peace. I once heard a story of a fart he did on a plane. Andre, not Trump.

What is wrong with the world and our systems of democracy that would allow a man like that within 100 feet of a school, let alone the presidency? But I digress. No, I don’t digress really. I just thought writing “but I digress” would sound clever. This is my level, and I have to accept that because I’ll never be accepting a Pulitzer Prize, or whatever the Australian equivalent of that is.

People predicted the American system had a flaw that would allow someone like Trump to lead the empire. Yet they left the flaw in so rich people didn’t have to worry about true and fair democratic systems taking hold. Ah, rich people. Always scheming to hold onto their wealth. Ah, rich people, always scheming in order to grow their wealth, power, and influence, and convince themselves that that is what is best for society because the common scum are too stupid. Ahh, rich people, always scheming to ensure the common scum remains ignorant and misinformed so they can say that the populace is too stupid to have decisions left in their hands.

I think the Chinese bureaucracy, filled with nerd decision-makers who got there mostly based on merit, are eating the capitalists’ and the West’s lunch. Democracy, who needs it if it’s just going to be a scam of the moneyed elite anyway? I, for one, welcome our new overlords. At least they have to meet benchmarks to find themselves in their position and don’t just have to be a prolific bullshitter who will happily sell out society and the world for money, position, and rank. What scum.

And if you’re thinking of voting for Pauline Hanson at the next Australian election, I’ve got some home truths for you. You think she tells it like it is and you identify with her as a real Aussie because she’s a dumbass like you with simple answers for simple people, unlike the Labor Party, who are actually looking after your interests (not that you’d know thanks to the bought-and-sold mainstream Murdoch media in Australia). But you don’t see them as looking after your interests because they are too smart and have too much nuance for your brain to handle. Not that there is anything wrong with not knowing how smart and great the Australian Labor Party is, as long as you keep it to yourself and don’t start telling it like it is, because you’re actually leaking mainstream media talking points from every pore in your body.

I love you just the way you are. Not understanding politics or the good the Labor Party does for this country doesn’t make you dumb, it just makes you misinformed. You’re probably heaps good at a range of stuff, just not politics. And for heaven’s sake, stop listening to the telly and stop listening to people telling it like it is, because the truth is far more complex and you’re being fed stuff that might sound on the money, but is just bullshit with cherries.